Cream Cheese Brownies

Mark Bittman lured me in with the promise "the richest, densest, most luxurious brownies I know - sort of like very heavy chocolate cheesecake." Well... I guess. I'm not going to type out this recipe exactly as given because it was sort of ridiculous, three separate bowls etc etc etc BUT I will give you an approximation, in case you want a pile of your own. What came out sort of looked like throw-up, took on the form of a pile and tasted pretty good (only while warm - Kate sez: "If you  had the dedication to eat the whole thing right after it came out of the oven, that would probably be the best way to do it"). Not a failure, not quite a "success", but definitely chocolate.

Happy Spring! Peppermint Bark

I got the stuff to make this over winter break. So three months ago. But it's really easy which is why I didn't make it until last night, you should make some too.Inspiration for this comes from my bff Laura who makes this around the holidays and then would let me eat it all xoxo

Are you there God? It's Lemon Bars

This are pretty easy! And they're tasty.
Recipe courtesy of my dear old friend Mark Bittman (it's okay buddy, I know the divorce has been really hard on you. Hang in there)

And now, for your reading pleasure, a recipe for lemon squares, with notes from yours truly.

"Pecan" Passion

The aunt of a friend of mine makes delicious cookies every year for christmas. She was nice enough to share with me both cookies and the recipe for these which are basically chocolate with nuts and caramel... ask Eli, I seriously couldn't get enough of these cookies and couldn't have been more excited to try my hand and making them once I was back in Philly.

So... "Pecan Passion" by way of Pam Wright, originally from: Maida Heatter's Brand-New Book of Great Cookies

Toasting the "Pecans" (I used walnuts, so sue me, they were a lot cheaper at the shoprite)

"First, toast the pecans for the top layer. Place them in a shallow pan in a 350-degree oven for about 10 minutes, siring once or twice, until they have a strong smell of toasted pecans when you open the oven door. Set them aside."  

mmm... nothing like the smell of toasting nuts "when you open the oven door"

 Making the bottom layer:

•   3 oz unsalted butter 
• 1/2 cup firmly packed light brown sugar 
• 1/8 tsp. salt 
• 1/2 tsp. vanilla 
• 1 egg 
• 1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder 
• 1/4 cup flour

 

Sean loves to help!

Preheat the oven to 375, line the "9x9" (or 11 x 7 in this case) pan with tin foil, and grease it...mmmm pam

Melt the 3/4 stick of butter and add the sugar, salt, vanilla and egg. Mix it up!

  Use your pretend electric mixer, it makes it a lot easier.

Beat in the cocoa and flour...

 Maida sez: "Place this thick chocolate mixture in a ribbon or in several mounds all over the bottom of the lined pan. With the bottom of a metal sppon, spread the mixture in an even layer. It will be a thin layer. It will level itself while baking. Bake for about 15 minutes, until the shallow cake springs back when gently pressed with a fingertip.Remove the pan from the oven and let stand."

 

Look ma, two hands!

Put that baby in the oven, and get ready for the stressful part....

PECAN TOPPING

• 1 Tablespoon dark rum or cognac 
• 1/3 cup heavy cream 
• 3 oz unsalted butter 
• 1 1/2 cup firmly packed light brown sugar 
• scant 1/4 tsp salt 
• 1/4 dark corn syrup 
• 7oz (2 cups) toasted pecan halves

"Add the rum or cognac to the cream, set aside."  - I was ready to stop here, this was probably the best thing I've ever smelled.... boot leg egg nog anyone?

 

Melt the butter in a saucepan. Stir in the sugar, salt, and corn syrup. Stir this until it begins to "BOIL ALL OVER THE SURFACE"

Get ready, because this is where things start to get dicey:

"Place a sugar thermometer in the pan and cook, stiring occassionally, until the temperature reaches 250 degrees (this takes about two minutes of boiling). Watch it carefully - do not let it cook even a bit too long." 

Luckily Sean was there to hold the candy thermometer. We did our own New-Years style count up, 175, 200, 225, 250! Take it off the heat OR ELSE!

 "Remove from the heat and quickly stir in the cream mixture and then the pecans. Immediately pour the hot mixture over the bottom layer. Bake at 375 degrees for 25 minutes. Time this very carefully. If yu bake it the least bit too long, it will become hard."

At this point, I started having a really hard time judging whether Maida was just trying to be helpful or if she was undermining me....all is well that ends well however...SIKE

25 minutes later:

 

WOW LOOK HOW GOOD THIS LOOKS!!!!!!!!!!

MMMMMM!!!!!!!

PECAN PASSION!!!!!!!

Oh wait! It didn't work out. At all....

 Bye bye!!

After all that, I was left with a very pleasant caramel and nut combo on top of an impenetrable crust of burnt chocolate. Bummer! I scraped off as much of the top as I could and was left with this....

I'm not sure if my oven was too hot, if I cooked it for too long, made too many substitutions or if my immortal corn syrup is to blame....

I can't wait to eat this in 20130 after the apocalypse.

Anyway, I was pretty disappointed because these should have been SO FUCKING GOOD. But, Sean was nice enough to point out the top part came out alright, so I think up next will be caramels... maybe with sea salt. mmmmmmm! 

p.s. if anyone wants a coherent version of this recipe to try their hand at email me: kaydetto at gmail dot com